Mistress Andria

Dumb Dumb bought me some REALLY cool shoes for being a jackass on the phone. According to him Ive brainwashed him and fucked with him so bad that Ive ruined him HAHAHAHAHA his wife continues to cheat on him and make up some really creative stories on why shes out having fun till all hours while he paces the floor waiting for her to come home. Dumb Dumb sucked off two cocks a few weeks ago and then came home with his cummy lips and kissed his wife HAHAHAHA Im trying to get Dumb Dumb to leave her because shes a stupid bitch and he already hates her as it is!!

Malcolm from the UK called and has E.D. aka LIMP DICK SYNDROME he has a four inch pathetic pussy and his wife cucks him as much as possible and he throws tantrums like a small child because she goes out and fucks and has sex with REAL MEN, Mal just give it up dude YOU SUCK!!! another pathetic weak link in the male chain!!

Paul the pig from Germany sent me $100.00 because he is such a pathetic fucking LOSER, he lays on his bed dreaming of me and how great it would be to be tortured by me. I love my piggies!!

I am taking calls all day today and all next week including the weekends, if you cannot do a phone session I am available via instant messanger

I got to talk to a new Irish pig. He went on webcam for me and we had sooo much fun. He had a black sharpie pen and I had him shove it up his ass and fuck himself while I laughed and mocked him for being such a dumb slag. I had a fantastic time and the next time you go on cam for me piggy you better SHAVE and brush your fucking hair!!! Going to POD is no excuse for looking like a slob

I had a fantastic new caller from Canada. We had a nice long session and I have named him Captain Tidy Bowl bitch. He is my new lap dog and I had him shove his nasty face in the toilet and blow bubbles in the water while I was laughing at how fucking stupid he was. I also wanted to show him a new way to wash his hair so I had him flush his head down the toilet and it was a fanfuckingtastic time!!! He hides in his basement away from his wife and the toilet was disgusting and dirty so I had him give it a literal SPIT SHINE with his tongue. Nothing like a nasty fuck like him to keep the party going! hope to chat soon you freaky fuck!

I have a new caller who is in the medical proffesion. I have had a lot of fun with him the last couple of days and he is going down the trail to my trap I have set for him… its like hunting season right now with all these blackmail boys who have high pressure jobs that want to hand over the control to me, the cruel heartless goddess who loves fucking over people like you. Dr. Dumbass gets sent many hot photos of me to think about while hes working with his patients, and sending me nice tributes as I pull him in closer and closer.

Dumb Dumb called again, he was in a emotional state of mental hospital material… he slipped for a second but has bought me a nice gift to make up for his Fucktard mistake, I hope to talk to Dumb Dumb again and I have promised I will act like his brain fart never happened so we can move on and hopefully make some life changing decisions for him. See what tributes and gifts do? Yep they buy you more of my wickedness and forgiveness LOL

So I have a question for all you stupid small dicked men of the world.. I know there are a ton of you out there but want to ask ONE question… Im out the other day doing some shopping for shoes, dresses, makeup, new duvet ect ect and I am driving along and notice lately that a bunch of losers are taking up the roads in the below type of piece of shit…

WHY in the world would you take a old piece of shit car and do this? I can understand the raised trucks for you rednecks out in the world but these ugly cars that I would NOT be caught dead in or around seem to be popping up more and more. This one actually has a OK paint job.. and that is not saying much because the ones in town are NEON green, yellow, orange, pink ect… one guy actually said *hey baby you want to go for a ride?* I spit my Starbucks Frappacino all over my steering wheel and choked while laughing and told him I would rather be set on fire then step foot in that piece of shit. I would love a phone call from one of you losers explaining this new piece of shit car fetish…. Im all ears darling.

I will be here all weekend so catch me before i sign off for the day!!

Thank you Cumbucket for my new swimsuit!!! below is a photo of me in it and I love it!!

John is back and sniffing as many butts as he can while he pretends to need help with his patients. John works with a special air machine and I love hearing his stories of adventures in the hospital. John has a pathetic tiny inch worm cock that NO WOMAN WANTS. He also cannot get a date because his dick is so small LOL John knows that I am a size queen and I love big fat cock and no little shrimp dick will ever get near this body!

I got to talk to another caller that comes and goes but is always a lot of fun! *R* called me for some first class cock control and wanted to jerk his meat stick off before going to Atlantic City. I asked if I could come along and he turned me down!! HAHAHAAHA he thought I was being serious and told me it was a group of guys all crammed into ONE hotel room and they were going to go play poker and if I was around they would be too distracted LOL

Dumb Dumb continues to call me and is having some serious problems right now. Dumb Dumb is basically stuck in a shitty situation and I am giving him my honest opinion about everything. Even if the truth hurts I always think it is much better then lying to someone even if it makes them want to jump off a bridge or set themselves on fire, at least they will go knowing I said it like it was LMAO

So sucker boys again I thank you for your kind gifts, some of you fat asses need to lay off the chocolate rabbits tommorro so you do not get any nastier then you already are. Pigboy you have my permission to stuff your gob tommorro till you get sick since you sent me the beautiful flowers and the huge Starbucks easter basket.. see I DO reward pigs for good behavior!!!

I got to talk to Dumb Dumb… I have not talked to his pathetic ass since right before Christmas. He is still a loser and still has a shitty life. Different things are happening in Dumb Dumbs world that I promised I would not reveal. I have a very close relationship with this stupid bitch and I ALWAYS keep my word. Ill just say that he is still a Dumb Dumb and I hope we can talk again real soon.

Fatfuck called LOL OMG this fat piece of shit puts on the BEST webcam show I have seen in weeks! Fatfuck weighs almost 400 lbs and I can NEVER see his tiny twat under all those fat layers. I have nothing against large people but Fatfuck gets off on me telling him what a Hippo he really is! Oh he also pigs out and eats the entire time on the phone but of course I put my wicked spin on things and make him eat out of a dog dish with his fat arms behind his back… hahahaha!

My very special St. Pattys Day is coming up and so far Lee, Brandon and Ryan have all sent me wonderful gifts for this special day! I am Irish and very proud of my heritage. I travel to Ireland as much as time will allow and plan on going back soon for another trip to Dublin.. the place where I wish I could call home. I will be meeting with Ian and Niahl at Club M which is my favorite hot spot. These are two Irish slaves who have been serving me for four years and have earned the right to spoil me with Krystal all night long while renting out the entire VIP lounge for me and my girlfriends and we MIGHT let them come in and stand up against the wall and watch us have fun. Easter is right after that and I have been told some very cool Easter gifts are coming my way!! actually Pittboy has sent me two pairs of Chinese Laundry shoes off my wishlist and a Bath and Body works card for Easter…. thank you Pittboy maybe someday I can walk on you with the heels and dig them into your balls like you want me to do so bad Thats all for now, hope to talk with you twats real soon!!

Ok so yesterday I went to the door and a huge box was waiting for me….

As most of you know I LOVE the Atlanta Braves and have a TON of Braves fan gear on my wishlist.. ok back to the box… someone DID go to my list and bought me THE KILLER ATLANTA BRAVES BEAN BAG OFF MY WISHLIST!!!!!!!!! My perfect ass is sitting snug in it as I type!! I LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT!!! BUT I have NO idea who sent it to me!! There was no receipt, no note no nothing!! I do not want to appear ungrateful to whoever bought it.. but if you do not step up I cannot thank you properly with Freebies anyways thanks again and I have updated the list with MORE Braves gear since the season is about to kick off!! Thanks again to everyone who sent me nice goodies for Valentines… Easter is next!!! woohooo I love spring break!!

Trash Slave is back in Da House of Andria!!!!! Yep for those of you who talked to me before I went out on my own you know who I am talking about!!! Trash Slave!!! Trash Slave is a fat fuck who takes A LOT of time off work and sits around and watches Dom movies and worships my photos LOL he contacted me a few days ago and he cannot wait to get back into training! Trash Slave likes to wear Glad XXX FAT sized trash bags on his body and his shiny orange go go boots!! LOL he also is a big fan of any kind of RAIN GEAR!! He likes polka dotted rain coats off Ebay and shit like that, hes a LOT of fun on the phone and Im so glad he is back.

Nip/Tuck season finale was Tuesday night and I have to say it SUCKED. This is my favorite show and I was hoping for a bigger production and they need to get rid of that stupid bitch Colleen who is off her fucking rocker. I do not think Sean is dead, I just hated the ending and will have to sit here and wait for it to start back again. That means that Rescue Me should be back on!!! that is another one of my favorite shows YUM YUM Firefighters!!!

One of my British boys bought me Footballers wives season 1-3 and OMG Im totally hooked and PISSED they ended the show at season three!! Gary Lucy who plays Kyle Pascoe if you are reading this CALL ME AND ILL GIVE YOU A FREEBIE… LOL OMG what a total and complete BABE! all those hot naked footie players taking showers drool… Im already on the last season and every episode has been great. As you can see I have been busy getting cool stuff from you boys and catching up on all these dvds I got from Christmas!!! Keep em coming!! I love them all!!

Oh and Piece of shit Paul from Germany has come back to me. He told me I scared him soooo bad that he has been hiding from me for a YEAR! But this twat turd couldnt stand it any longer, he reads my blog and worships everything that I do and cannot stay away. I expect to hear from you soon you whiney, ugly, small dicked, hand humping pathetic rancid pile of worthless shit! well boys I have a session thats coming on the line.. gotta run.. be good!

PIN DICK ADAM FROM ABERDEEN SCOTLAND…. a NICE online Victoria Secrets gift card. Adam I really miss you dearly and wish you would stop working so hard so you can spend more time worshipping me LOL I LOVED the message you attached to the Valentines card *Im sending this early so you can buy something to wear for a big dicked man on Valentines day* Dont worry Adam you KNOW how much I love a nice big fat cock and since you have such a tiny pindick you will NEVER get to see the sexy ass lingerie I am going to buy for my Valentines date (and yes hes hangin at 9 inches!) Im sure he will LOVE the outfit that you are buying for me hahahahahahahaha so you can sit back and rub your tiny little tool DREAMING of what it must be like to be with such a hot woman like myself and to fuck her with a REAL cock, like I said DREAM ON ADAM… and thank you sweetie, you know how much I appreciate everything you buy for me, always classy stuff and always thinking of my well being

Petey~ Petey ALSO has a tiny tool. Petey sent me a box of Godiva chocolates and a beautiful Chanel handbag because he has no girlfriend to take care of and spends all his free time and money on ME.. thats the way it should be!! The bag is absolutely gorgeous lil Petey.. you have great taste… but a pathetic dick.

Sean~ My Jack off Gigalo…. a Spa Finder gift card for $200.00 The Spa is one of my FAVORITE places in the world to go… thank you so much for the wonderful gift.

BTW~ I put your initials so you can stop being so paranoid… a lovely refill on my Starbucks card for $50.00 I am addicted to Starbucks.. and my hot little mouth thanks you for your nice gift!!